12 Comments
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Antonio Castellaneta's avatar

One thought stayed with me throughout this essay: perhaps what we call “presence” is also a form of mourning for everything we quietly handed away without realizing it. Thank you for reminding us that some things cannot be optimized—only lived.

Lucy Blachnia's avatar

You have a point, in the past no one needed to acknowledge they were present or not, they just were in the moment. We are all mourning these moments that are long gone but still vivid in our memories. Probably we romanticise them too

Next 30, Your Terms's avatar

What really stayed with me was your point that we didn’t lose presence all at once. It disappeared so gradually that most of us accepted the trade without realizing what we were giving up. I also kept thinking about how this shows up in money. The same habits that pull us away from the present make it easy to avoid opening an investment statement, reviewing a retirement plan, or noticing that small financial decisions have quietly become big ones. Presence isn’t just emotional. It’s practical.

This gave me a lot to think about. Thank you for writing it.

Lucy Blachnia's avatar

It is very practical indeed. Thank you for dedicating time to read my work, I really appreciate it! No ready answers, just food for thought and material to arrive to your own conclusions

Next 30, Your Terms's avatar

That’s exactly what I appreciated. Your piece doesn’t tell people what to think, it gives them a better lens through which to think. Those are the essays that stay with you long after you’ve finished reading. Thank you for sharing it.

Beth Shekinah 🪷's avatar

Insightful exploration! One of my mentors calls it the digitization of the human mind. The fact is that we always needed practices like meditation and contemplation to access the beauty of our essential nature but with this techno world we now live in it’s even more essential. I think the machine of presence marketing barely touches the depths of what’s needed and where our soul essence resides. This is the the work of our times! 🩵

Lucy Blachnia's avatar

People seek answers and guidance in these devices instead of looking deeper into themselves and what they really need and desire when no one is watching

Beth Shekinah 🪷's avatar

So true! One of the things that scares me most is when I hear folks talking about how AI can guide then in their shadow work and knowing their heart. It’s terrifying! And I do acknowledge it can be tool we can use hopefully in some beneficial ways. But there are no shortcuts to the soul! 🩵

Adrien Saell's avatar

I think the most important idea here is that many of us mistake adaptation for health. Humans are remarkably good at adapting to almost anything, including conditions that quietly diminish us. The absence of obvious suffering doesn't mean nothing valuable has been lost.

Sometimes the greatest cost of technological progress isn't what it changes, but what it makes us stop noticing...

Lucy Blachnia's avatar

Excellent point. Perphaps we stop noticing on purpose - running through the life so quickly we don’t want to give a deeper thought to anything and god forbid uncomfortable realisations we are following someone’s else’s priorities.

framersqool's avatar

I've never been more grateful than now, to have spent half a century of working life outdoors, a man among men, putting roofs over the heads of families. Nowadays it seems all anyone can think to do with their life is to learn some skill and spend the next umpteen years in some cubicle playing with computers, and then wondering why they have every behavioral disorder in the book for it, and so do their kids.

And the hypochondria of it all?!

Good grief, I haven't darkened the door of any doctor's office in years and hope never to allow any of those charlatans anywhere near me ever again. Then I get online, and what looks like ordinary sane people are mentioning someone called 'my therapist' as though this were some prerequisite of civilized life, rather than the overpriced bourgeois self-indulgence that it is.

Et cetera.

I've asked it all my life of the middle class way of life, and I'll ask it again:

What the fuck, at long last, is wrong with you people?

Lucy Blachnia's avatar

I see this as system issue than a single person problem. High-stress high-paid jobs that make you sick every morning are not worth the money and most importantly - health.